vendredi, octobre 07, 2016

Really nothing to say about this

U dveří čekali dva vojáci. Tvářili se unuděně a žen si skoro
nevšímali. K "výtahu" to byla opravdu dlouhá cesta.
Apoléna ho nedokázala přesně popsat, když o něm mluvila. Něco
takového se muselo vidět. Prakticky to byla obrovská, vepředu otevřená
krabice z těžkých trámů, připevněná na silné lano, které vedlo nahoru
a dolů jakýmsi komínem v kameni. Když všichni nastoupili, zatáhl jeden
z vojáků za mnohem slabší provaz, který zmizel ve tmě. Druhý zapálil pár
svíček, jejichž úkolem očividně bylo ještě zahustit temnotu.
-- T. Pratchett: Podivný regiment


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 23:34:01 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

Bringen Hufeisen wirklich Glück? Ich bezweifle es - ich habe schon
viele unglückliche Pferde gesehen.
-- Pearl Sydenstricker Buck (Pseudonym: Sedges, John)


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 23:11:01 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

In unserem monogamischen Weltteile heißt heiraten, seine Rechte
halbieren und seine Pflichten verdoppeln.
-- Arthur Schopenhauer


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 22:34:02 (UTC+0200)

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Ještě není všem dnům konec.
-- Přísloví


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 22:11:01 (UTC+0200)

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In un comizio, non iniziate mai con la parola "niente": e' il programma
del vostro partito.
Iniziate con: "Io sono qui per parlare, voi siete li' per ascoltare.
Se qualcuno finisce prima di me, me lo faccia sapere".
-- Enrico Bertolino


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 21:34:01 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

Da diejenigen, welche wissenschaftliche Versuche anstellen,
selten wissen, was sie eigentlich wollen und was dabei herauskommen
soll, so verfolgen sie ihren Weg meistenteils mit großem Eifer; bald
aber, da eigentlich nichts Entschiedenes entstehen will, so lassen
sie die Unternehmung fahren und suchen sie sogar andern verdächtig zu
machen.
-- Goethe, Maximen und Reflektionen, Nr. 983


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 21:11:02 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

I maschi delle specie dalle femmine birichine hanno testicoli di
maggiori dimensioni rispetto ai maschi delle specie fedeli.
-- Marina Verna, da "La Stampa"


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 20:34:01 (UTC+0200)

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Dieu créa l'homme et, ne le trouvant pas assez seul, il lui donna une
compagne pour mieux lui faire sentir sa solitude.
-+- Paul Valéry -+-


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 20:11:02 (UTC+0200)

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L'homme est de glace aux vérités ;
IL est de feu pour les mensonges.
-+- Jean de La Fontaine (1621-1695),
Le Statuaire et la Statue de Jupiter (Fables IX.6) -+-


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 19:34:01 (UTC+0200)

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L'art d'écrire précède la pensée.
-+- Émile Chartier, dit Alain (1868-1951), Propos de littérature -+-


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 19:11:01 (UTC+0200)

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Viver � a coisa mais rara do mundo. A maioria das pessoas apenas existe.
-- Oscar Wilde


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 18:34:01 (UTC+0200)

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Sen je sůl bez chleba.
-- Serna


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 18:11:02 (UTC+0200)

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Самокритика - одна из форм кокетства.
-- Ю.З.Рыбников


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 17:34:01 (UTC+0200)

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De Hispanice puella verumque
Simplex oris verborumque
Tulit potens vagina
Hominum agmina
Iterum iterum iterumque.


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 17:11:01 (UTC+0200)

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It is annoying to be honest to no purpose.
-- Publius Ovidius Naso (Ovid)


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 16:34:01 (UTC+0200)

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People who take cat naps don't usually sleep in a cat's cradle.


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 16:11:01 (UTC+0200)

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Ženatí muži žijí déle - nebo jim to alespoň tak připadá.
-- Nestroy


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 15:34:02 (UTC+0200)

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Když už je vše ztraceno, zůstává ještě budoucnost.
-- Bowie


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 15:11:01 (UTC+0200)

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BOFH excuse #328:

Fiber optics caused gas main leak


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 14:34:01 (UTC+0200)

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Si Dieu s'est fait homme pour avoir de l'autorité sur terre, c'est qu'il
se rendait compte qu'un homme, ça fait tout de même plus sérieux.
-+- Boris Vian -+-


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 14:11:01 (UTC+0200)

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Ich geh' kaputt - gehst du mit?


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 13:34:01 (UTC+0200)

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Que choisir a testé les peep shows. 60 millions de cons sont mateurs.
-+- Les nuls -+-


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 13:11:02 (UTC+0200)

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The New Testament offers the basis for modern computer coding theory,
in the form of an affirmation of the binary number system.

But let your communication be Yea, yea; nay, nay:
for whatsoever is more than these cometh of evil.
-- Matthew 5:37


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 12:34:02 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

There are some micro-organisms that exhibit characteristics of both plants
and animals. When exposed to light they undergo photosynthesis; and when
the lights go out, they turn into animals. But then again, don't we all?


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 12:11:01 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

Certa noite, a m�e toma um t�xi com a garotinha de 5 anos de idade e
ao pararem diante de um sem�foro a garotinha v� v�rias prostitutas em
trajes ex�guos fazendo ponto na esquina.

-- M�e! O que s�o essas mulheres todas?

Ao que a m�e, constrangida, responde:

-- N�o � nada n�o, filhinha. S�o s� as esposas esperando os maridos
sa�rem da f�brica.

-- Ora, dona -- intrometeu-se o chofer -- Por que a senhora n�o diz a
verdade? Essas mulheres s�o todas protitutas. Ganham a vida
vendendo o corpo.

A m�e ficou vermelh�ssima.

-- E elas tem filhos? -- tornou a garotinha.

-- T�m sim, minha filha! -- respondeu a m�e.

-- E o que eles fazem?

-- Dirigem t�xi.


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 11:34:01 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

Totéž chtít a totéž nechtíti - to je pravé přátelství.
-- latinské přísloví


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 11:11:01 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

Brzo odpoledne, když Hrun Barbar projížděl pralesem, našel vedle
cesty velkou bednu. Její víko bylo otevřeno, jako by zvalo, a v jejím
nitru bylo vidět velké množství zlata. Jenže když seskočil s koně a chtěl
se na truhlu podívat zblízka, truhla najednou vystrčila stovky malých
nožiček, vyběhla klusem do pralesa a zastavila se o několik set yardů dál.
A teď, po několika hodinách namáhavého pronásledování, ztratil
truhlu v tomhle pekelném bludišti podzemních tunelů. Vzato kolem a kolem,
odporné řezby a tu a tam ležící kostry, které míjel, Hruna nijak neděsily.
Zčásti to bylo tím, že Hrun neměl nijak zvlášť velkou představivost, ale
také proto, že podzemní tunely a chodby spadaly do jeho pracovní náplně.
Strávil v podobných situacích mnoho času, hledal zlato, démony nebo panny
v nesnázích a ty zbavoval jejich majitelů, životů, nebo alespoň té nesnáze
největší.
-- T. Pratchett: Barva kouzel


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 10:34:01 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

Saint : Pécheur mort, revu et corrigé.
-+- Ambrose Bierce -+-


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 10:11:02 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

Alcuni si ritengono perfetti unicamente perche' sono meno esigenti nei
propri confronti.
-- Hermann Hesse


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 09:34:01 (UTC+0200)

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Seconda Legge delle Modifiche ai Progetti:
Quanto piu' innocua sembrera' una modifica, tanto piu' le sue
conseguenze si estenderanno e maggiore sara' il numero dei disegni
che dovranno essere rifatti.


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 09:11:01 (UTC+0200)

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Der Romanenheld assimiliert sich alles; der Theaterheld muss
nichts Ähnliches in allem dem finden, was ihn umgibt.
-- Goethe, Maximen und Reflektionen, Nr. 789


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 08:34:01 (UTC+0200)

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Umění nemůže vyjadřovat chaos chaosem.
-- Čep


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 08:11:01 (UTC+0200)

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Amour, amour, quand tu nous tiens,
On peut bien dire : Adieu prudence.
-+- Jean de La Fontaine (1621-1695),
Le Lion amoureux (Fables IV.1) -+-


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 07:34:01 (UTC+0200)

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Die Zeitung ist die Konserve der Zeit.
-- Karl Kraus


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 07:11:01 (UTC+0200)

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Harry came into work on Monday feeling absolutely fine, and so was astonished
when his secretary urged him to lie down on the sofa; even more so when his
boss took one look at him and ordered him to take the day, if not the week,
off. Even his poker buddies wouldn't have anything to do with him, insisting
that he go straight to bed. Finally, tired of resisting everyone's advice,
he went to see his doctor, who took one look at him and rushed over with
a stretcher.
"But doctor," he protested, "I feel fine."
Well, this was a puzzler, conceded the doctor, who proceeded to refer to the
enormous reference tomes behind his desk, muttering to himself.
"Looks good, feels good... No, you look like hell. Looks good,
feels terrible... Nah, you feel fine, right?"
Thumbing furiously through another volume, he said,
"Looks terrible, feels terrible... Nope, that won't do it either."
Finally, "Looks terrible, feels terrific... Aha!! You're a vagina!"


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 06:34:01 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

Девственность в 18 лет - предмет гордости, в 30 лет - ирония судьбы,
в 50 - символ невостребованности.
-- И. Шевелев


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 06:11:02 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

There is a Massachusetts law requiring all dogs to have their hind legs
tied during the month of April.


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 05:34:01 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

Quando la mamma dice: "Torna presto" e "Vai piano"...
... non e' una contraddizione?
-- Andrea `Zuse' Balestrero, "Piccoli feti crescono"


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 05:11:02 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

Ja, mach nur einen Plan, sei nur ein großes Licht, und mach noch einen
zweiten Plan, gehn tun sie beide nicht.
-- Berthold Brecht (Dreigroschenoper)


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 04:34:01 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

Bajka vypráví o tobě, jen jméno je změněno.
-- Horatius


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 04:11:01 (UTC+0200)

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Attention ! J'ai le glaive vengeur et le bras séculier !
L'aigle va fondre sur la vieille buse !...
- Un peu chouette comme métaphore, non?
- C'est pas une métaphore, c'est une périphrase.
- Fais pas chier !...
- Ça, c'est une métaphore.
-+- Michel Audiard -+-


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 03:34:01 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

There was once a salesman who had an outstanding record for selling tooth-
brushes. His boss, wondering at his unlikely success, sent a man out to
follow the salesman on rounds to see what pitch he gave that brought such
good results. It was soon found that this particular salesman went to the
corner of a busy street and opened up his briefcase, and on one side was the
assortment of toothbrushes, and on the other side various chips and garnishes
and a bowl of brownish stuff. He would grab a likely customer and give them
the following pitch.
"Good morning, ma'am, this is a commercial promotion for --- brand
of chip dip. Would you care to give it a try?"
At that point the person would try it, then spit it out and scream
in utter disgust, "This tastes like shit!"
The salesman would smile and say, "It is. You want to buy a
toothbrush?"


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 03:11:01 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

To krásné jasné ráno jeden z krkavců poskakoval pomalu po pláži
a bezcílně sekal zobákem hned sem, hned tam pro případ, že by se některé
z oblázků, ulit a skořápek přes noc proměnily v něco jedlého. Podle krkavčí
zkušenosti bylo jedlé všechno, když se to nechalo odležet dost dlouho.
-- T. Pratchett: Malí bohové


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 02:34:02 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

Programa de computador: estranha forma de vida que tem a capacidade de
transformar comandos em mensagens de erro.


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 02:11:01 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

Comment se fait-il que la mathématique, qui est un produit de la pensée
humaine et indépendante de toute expérience, s'adapte d'une si admirable
manière aux objets de la réalité ?
-+- Albert Einstein -+-


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 01:34:01 (UTC+0200)

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- Sai cos'e' un'ippocastano?
- Un ippopotamo ossigenato!


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 01:11:01 (UTC+0200)

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on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 00:34:01 (UTC+0200)

Really nothing to say about this

Škoda, že být starý je jediný způsob, jak dlouho žít.
-- Lesseps


on the vendredi 7 octobre 2016, 00:11:01 (UTC+0200)